Archive for December, 2009

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-12-25

Friday, December 25th, 2009
  • RT @steellegs: On plane still. Take off now in 50mins! Ryanair are cheap but completely shite. #
  • RT @DiogoSnows: hates the way #Ryanair works! Everything has a second meaning and they get money from not informing people properly! #
  • 11 days to go until Ryanair start charging for Electron card payments. Avoid the new fees, sign up here quick http://bit.ly/5PTbJJ #
  • RT @AirObserver: Snow grounds Ryanair flight as thirsty passengers forced to ‘lick ice to drink’ - Telegraph: http://bit.ly/84FFmA #
  • RT @Carrie_Latitude: For the 4th year in a row,Ryanair is travellers least favourite airline by an amazing 41% http://bit.ly/8sScka #
  • Ryanair crash, all passengers safe. Cabin crew selling bus tickets back to terminal. bit.ly/6VyPjO #
  • RT @ryanairmobile:Ryanair suspends Italian domestic flights from 23rd January over row with Italian Aviation Authority. http://bit.ly/5pICyW #

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Ryanair plane crashes off runway in Prestwick

Wednesday, December 23rd, 2009

A Ryanair aircraft has gone off the end of a runway at Prestwick Airport in the west of Scotland.

Emergency services are on the way to the scene. Strathclyde Fire and Rescue have confirmed they have sent three appliances to the incident.

It is understood the aircraft had been coming in to land when it overshot the runway. An eyewitness said it had come to rest partially on the grass.

Police said there were not believed to be any injuries.

Ryanair win the TripAdviser Worst Airline award for 4th year running

Tuesday, December 22nd, 2009

Ryanair, the World’s most hated airline, have been voted exactly that in the annual TripAdviser travel awards.

TripAdvisor UK announced the results of its annual travel trends survey of more than 700 Britons, revealing that travellers are unable to predict the final cost of their flight, with nearly one-third paying unexpected additional costs at check-in.

Travellers have become more surprised by the final price of their air ticket in the past three months. As a result of ‘add-ons,’ 73 percent have been surprised by the final cost of flight, up five percent from a survey conducted in September.*

Additionally, 32 percent, up 18 percent from three months ago, have checked in at an airport and paid additional costs they were not expecting.

The favourite airline for British travellers is Virgin Atlantic. For the fourth year in a row, Ryanair is travellers’ least favourite airline by an overwhelming 41 percent, up from 30 percent last year.

It’s the 4th year in a row that Ryanair have “won” this prestigious accolade and demonstrates clearly that they are universally hated.

2009 review - A year in the life of Ryanair

Monday, December 21st, 2009

Ryanair, the World’s most hated airline, have had a pretty crap year and we have been busy ensuring that you heard all about it. From breaches of safety to being ordered to pay compensation to passengers, employing the nastiest scams in order to rip you all off, closing routes without notice, low level buzzing of grannies and making nasty threats to Boeing. It’s what Ryanair are all about!

A year in the life of Ryanair.

Following a quiet January. Ryanair cocked up by locking in fuel prices of $124 a barrel for 80 per cent of its consumption during the third quarter, but the price of oil collapsed to a low of $33. This left O’Leary €102 million in the red.

In late February, rumours starting doing the rounds that O’Leary was looking at imposing a charge on his aircraft for using the toilet. We thought this really took the piss and reported it on the 27th Feb in our article “Spend a penny? How about a pound“.

March was all about the Ryanair Porn Star Edita Schindlerova. The 22 year old secretly appears in X-rated movies and gets a good shafting as ‘Edita Bente’ when not part of shafting Ryanair customers.

Ryanair were also embroiled in a twitter controversy when an official Ryanair twitter account was used to describe passengers as “smelling of urine”. They then went one step further by freaking out at a blogger who had uncovered some flaws with the Ryanair website. Not such a hard thing to demonstrate we think!

Fat tax

Fat tax

In April, Mr O’Leary came up with his idea of a Ryanair Fat Tax for over weight passengers. For logistical and legal reasons, the plan died. Human rights advocates also believed that it may have resulted in an absurd situation where the airline was unable to charge its fattest passengers because that would classify as discrimination against the disabled but would be able to charge the “mildly overweight”!

April also saw O’Leary dismissing apocalyptic warnings of a global swine flu pandemic, saying that the virus was only a risk to Asians and Mexicans “living in slums”. How charming you are Mr O’Leary.

In May, the Fat Tax was formally ruled out, we bought you news on Ryanair’s new charge for people checking in online and then provided you all with what turned out to be an incredibly popular list of 20 reasons never to fly Ryanair.

June was the month of the Ryanair scam but not before they somehow managed to piss off the Queen of Spain after they used a photo of Queen Sofia in an advertisement for the budget airline.

The scams then came thick and fast with Ryanair first launching the SMS booking confirmation scam. As we reported, if online check in is now mandatory, why the need for an SMS confirmation?

Then came the Ryanair coach ticket scam which offered tickets billed as being substantially cheaper than if you were to buy in the airport, a blatant lie and a time consuming scam for passengers.

This was followed by the Ryanair visa check scam. This has caught out thousands of passengers and netted Ryanair hundreds of thousands of pounds in illegal charges.

We also reported a shocking story regarding Ryanair employing transvestite cabin crew on their flights. The saucy little minx was spotted on a Ryanair flight from Stansted and looked thoroughly pleased with the attention she/he was getting whilst performing the pre-flight checks.

In July, Ryanair were reprimanded by the OFT following scores of complaints to the Advertising Standards Authority regarding their “free” flights. Ryanair were made to promise to give greater prominence to information regarding “optional” charges, such as those for checking in luggage.

O’Leary also decided that making passengers stand on flights would allow him to squeeze a few more onboard and thus a few more pennies into his fat piggy bank. Passengers would be eligible for a 50% saving if they booked these “vertical seats”.  Quite how a 50% discount from a ticket that is being already sold at only £1 can attract anyone we just don’t know.

We announced on 17th July - “Ryanair leaving you in middle of nowhere again” - that Ryanair were launching new services from Oslo (Rygge). Here we demonstrated that Rygge is so far away from Oslo and flies to such poorly located airports that a trip to Barcelona would take over 8 hours.

In August, Ryanair accused the company that runs Stansted airport (BAA) of being “a bunch of overcharging rapists” and that they were “scamming” the airlines that use these airports. Ha ha ha, how hypocritical of you Mr O’Leary.

Ryanair also announced plans to switch or close nine of the 10 routes it currently operates from Manchester Airport, blaming the airport’s refusal to lower its charges.

The DAA (Dublin Airport Authority) reported in August that Ryanair’s charges had exploded.  For example:

  • Ryanair’s baggage check-in charge has increased by 600% since 2006
  • The charge for using a credit card to book a Ryanair flight has increased by 285% since 2006
  • The cost of changing a Ryanair flight booking has increased by 66% since 2006
  • The cost of carrying sports equipment  on a Ryanair flight has increased by 97% since 2006

In September 2009, Ryanair were shown to have the highest costs for food and drink served on board an aircraft. More than any of the other principal British or Irish airlines.

They were also fined $54,000 by Hungary’s competition authority GVH for misleading customers about ticket prices.

This was promptly followed up by some scientific analysis of Ryanair on-time arrivals at Stansted that showed the Ryanair was only achieving a 25% on time arrival rate.

Not wanting to be shown to be the thieving, lying gits they are, Ryanair promptly increased checked in baggage fees by 50%.

October saw an opportunity for Ryanair, Ireland’s largest carrier, to show solidarity with it’s country folk traveling to Paris for the France v Ireland World Cup clash by lowering fares. They duly increased fares to Paris by 1000%. Nice one O’Leary.

Ryanair kicked off November with an announcement that they were planning on increasing the “fine” passengers who forget to print out their own boarding cards are made to pay to €100. Mr O’Leary claimed the fee increase would help eliminate the number of passengers who show up at check-in desks without their boarding pass.

Some good news followed when we reported that Surfbox, an Irish internet company, were offering print outs of passenger boarding cards as a service for just €1. Surfbox said 100 Ryanair passengers a day are printing off their boarding cards at its kiosks in Dublin airport. The estimated loss in ancillary revenue to Ryanair stands at about €117,000 per month

Ryanair replied by closing all six of its routes to and from Basel, Switzerland’s third largest city. Basel airport had refused to be shafted by the demands Ryanair where making over airport fees. Good on them we say.

November 9th saw the inaugural Holiday Extras Customers’ Awards 2009 take place at a stylish ceremony at The Hempel Hotel in London. It came as no surprise to see that Ryanair, the world’s most hated airline, won absolutely nothing.

A court in Dublin then awarded three Ryanair passengers €6,000 (£5,300) in compensation for a flight that was cancelled in 2007. The customers had booked the flight from London to Carcassonne, France, in September 2007, and when it was cancelled had sought redress from Ryanair. With none forthcoming, they contacted EUClaim, a Netherlands-based company that represents airline passengers.

We followed up with a report that Ryanair were being sued by members of a small community near the northern German city of Lübeck who have filed a lawsuit against the grotty, evil, Irish carrier after a low-flying plane allegedly put an 82-year-old woman in the hospital.

The bad news continued for O’Leary when Ryanair were ordered to pay a family 11,000 kronor ($1,600) in compensation after they were left on the ground in Gothenburg in April this year.

On the 30th November, Ryanair announced that it is to make MasterCard Prepaid cards the only form of free payment for consumers booking flights on its website from the end of December, dumping VISA electron in the process.

Early December saw Ryanair being nominated for the “ugliest and most useless info graphic of the year award” for its website route map.

Bad tempered O’Leary obviously then got the hump and decided to start bullying Boeing into lowering it’s fees on a potential 200 aircraft deal.

“We regret that our prolonged negotiations with Boeing have failed to reach a mutually acceptable conclusion,” said Ryanair boss Michael O’Leary.

He said the two partners had agreed pricing on the 200 aircraft, but that Boeing was unwilling to include some other terms and conditions that his company enjoyed in existing contracts.

“We have no plans to reopen discussions with Boeing or any other aircraft manufacturers… perhaps in the future there may be other opportunities for Ryanair and Boeing to work together,” Mr O’Leary added.

The airline said it would generate surplus cash between 2012 and 2015 because it would no longer be buying the aircraft, and that this would be distributed to shareholders.

In order to keep costs down, all Ryanair’s aircraft are made by Boeing.

Ryanair announce new logo to better reflect company values

Wednesday, December 16th, 2009

Lyingair, the world’s most hated airline, have today launched their new corporate logo that will be painted on the fins of all of their jet aircraft.

The no-thrills airline hired a top Dublin based branding consultancy to come up with the design and are rumored to have spent in the region of £5 (plus credit card fees) on it.

Stevie Whoseyafather, from Lyingair, commented: “I had to bend over for about an hour and half with Micky on top so the bloody agency could get the angle right, but we think it looks great and really shows off our corporate values”.

Pay no booking fee on Ryanair by paying with a pre-paid FairFX Mastercard. Apply now!

Ryanair to cancel all flights between Bristol & Pau in 2010

Wednesday, December 16th, 2009

Ryanair, the world’s most hated airline, are apparently pulling all flights between Bristol & Pau in 2010 according to a passenger who recently spoke to the no-thrills carrier through their rip-off charges customer call center.

Mr Evans, who had already booked himself a flight to Pau from Bristol next year, had returned to the Ryanair website to book a further ticket for his daughter and found that all flights during that entire month were full.

“Unless there’s some big nun pilgrimage to Lourdes, it was pretty unlikely the flights were all sold out, so I checked my on line booking (as it says) and all was fine. I checked my inbox and spam box (as it says) for a cancellation email and found nothing. I finally dug deep and called the rip off customer service line” commented Mr Evans.

“After a while I got through to an operator who informed me that ‘all flights to Bristol in 2010 are cancelled’. Well thanks a bunch for letting me know!” he added.

An IHR spokesman said “We call on Ryanair to let all passengers know that their flights from Bristol next year will not be taking place and to refund all monies due immediately.”

Mr Evans is now booked on an Easyjet flight from Gatwick to Biarritz and certainly wont be using Ryanair again.

Shame on you Mr O’Leary.

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-12-11

Friday, December 11th, 2009
  • RT @TheDMacca: RyanAir are the cheapest airline in every way except when it comes to your wallet. #
  • RT @MrSmartmoney: With Ryanair’s new £10 Visa Electron booking charge, its time to fly BA again, cheaper when you add up allRyanairs charges #
  • RT @worstoflowcost: Ryanair responds – says its my fault http://tinyurl.com/yezpwgo #

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Ryanair CEO O’Leary in mind game bullyboy tactics with Boeing

Wednesday, December 9th, 2009

Ryanair’s evil CEO Mr Michael O’Leary is again employing bullyboy tactics in an effort to scare Boeing into accepting lesser terms and conditions in the sale of 200 new aircraft to the Irish airline.

Negotiations have been ongoing for over a year now and O’Leary claims that Ryanair have “effectively reached agreement on the price for 200 aircraft, but Boeing now wants to renegotiate delivery terms that would be worse than we currently have”.

Ryanair’s board will meet Dec. 17. Mr. O’Leary said that if no deal had been reached by then, the deal would be off.

If the airline and Boeing can’t strike a deal, Mr. O’Leary has said that Ryanair will throttle back its expansion plans. It will defer deliveries from Boeing of several 737s ordered in recent years, cancel options to buy 10 737s, and distribute cash to shareholders. Beyond 2012, the company would largely stop growing for the foreseeable future, Mr. O’Leary has said.

A Boeing spokesman said the company wouldn’t comment on customer negotiations that were ongoing.

Well done Boeing, shame on you Ryanair. Grow up wont you.

Ryanair routemap shortlisted for most ugly and useless infographic

Wednesday, December 9th, 2009

Ryanair, the World’s crappiest airline with the crappiest website, was recently shortlisted in a competition to award the ugliest and most useless infographic.

The Ryanair routemap is a real opportunity for Ryanair to do something special. It is, however, a real let down and in all honesty a complete pile of crap.

Nominator Irena Hreljac commented “A click to the routes leads to this screen shot. I think no visualisation when you expect one makes a very useless visualisation (note the “Install Microsoft Silverlight” button). As for ugly, well, look at the context :)”.

Keep up the good work Ryanair. You useless bunch of idiots.


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