I Hate Ryanair

Ryanair, the World’s most hated airline, have been named in the 12 least ethical companies in the World.

This week, the Swiss research firm Covalence released its annual ranking of the overall ethical performance of multinational corporations. The idea behind the Covalence research is that there’s value - both for companies and consumers - in measuring corporations against an ethical standard.

To complete its ethics index, Covalence compiled both quantitative and qualitative data, spanning seven years, for 581 companies. The data encompass 45 criteria that include labor standards, waste management and human rights records. And because it is a reputation index, the Covalence survey also incorporates media, industry and NGO documents into its evaluation.

It came as absolutely no surprise to us, therefore, to discover Ryanair listed in the top 12 worst companies in the World.

In it’s findings, Covalence noted that Michael O’Leary, the CEO of Irish budget airline Ryanair, is “known for his outrageous behavior and aggressive cost-cutting measures” and that “employees of his company are reportedly forbidden from using the company’s pens or charging their cellphones with its electricity”.

O’Leary has also been known to get nasty with customers, yelling and cursing at one person who requested a refund after a relative fell ill.

Congratulations to O’Leary and Ryanair on their effort at gaining this fabulous accolade.

Ryanair, the World’s most hated airline, plans to increase its fares at its Dublin hub and probably across its European network, Chief Executive Michael O’Leary was quoted as saying on Thursday.

O’Leary told the Irish Times newspaper average fares could rise from the beginning of its next financial year in April.

O’Leary is to hold a news conference later on Thursday to discuss changes to Ryanair’s summer schedule from Dublin Airport.

“There will be an extensive range of frequency and capacity cuts (in Dublin) starting on the 28th of March,” O’Leary told the newspaper.

Ticket prices are closely watched by analysts and O’Leary said he would be surprised if they didn’t go up by at least 5 to 10 percent out of Ireland.

He added that average fares across the entire airline could rise from April 1.

The boss of Ryanair, the World’s most hated airline, claims he has become so unpopular with the airline’s passengers that half would be happy to see him dead.

Michael O’Leary said many more would rejoice when he finally steps down in around two years’ time after more than 17 years at the helm.

“I think there will be great joy, I think there will be dancing in the street at the idea of O’Leary leaving Ryanair,” he said.

“It will be a nicer, warmer, caring airline with me gone. I think half our passengers would like to see me dead and buried, actually, and eventually they’ll get what they want. Frankly, I couldn’t care less as long as they fly with us.”

Mr O’Leary (48), who recently announced he is considering ripping out seats on some services to take standing passengers, admitted he had done little to improve his image but said he was unconcerned about what people thought of him.

He predicted that once he had gone, the public perception of Ryanair would improve.

“I don’t think I’ve done a very good job on the whole customer image of Ryanair,” he said.

“Actually the service is phenomenal in terms of fares and our performance on punctuality, lost bags, and cancellations. One way or another we’re going to change come 2012.”

Asked about the qualities his successor would require he said: “All the qualities that I don’t have — sensitivity, passenger care, environmentally sensitive — all that kind of good, warm crap. They’d need to make up for 20 years of my mis-management in the areas that I don’t manage well.”

Ryanair, the World’s most hated airline, has confirmed that it has ended negotiations with Boeing over the purchase of 200 new aircraft.

It added it would not be looking to buy aircraft from another supplier.

Ryanair said that it would now bring forward plans to “significantly reduce growth and capital expenditures” between 2012 and 2015.

The airline said it would still take delivery of 112 Boeing aircraft between 2010 and 2012, as previously agreed.

“We regret that our prolonged negotiations with Boeing have failed to reach a mutually acceptable conclusion,” said Ryanair boss Michael O’Leary.

He said the two partners had agreed pricing on the 200 aircraft, but that Boeing was unwilling to include some other terms and conditions that his company enjoyed in existing contracts.

“We have no plans to reopen discussions with Boeing or any other aircraft manufacturers… perhaps in the future there may be other opportunities for Ryanair and Boeing to work together,” Mr O’Leary added.

The airline said it would generate surplus cash between 2012 and 2015 because it would no longer be buying the aircraft, and that this would be distributed to shareholders.

In order to keep costs down, all Ryanair’s aircraft are made by Boeing.

Lyingair, the world’s most hated airline, have today launched their new corporate logo that will be painted on the fins of all of their jet aircraft.

The no-thrills airline hired a top Dublin based branding consultancy to come up with the design and are rumored to have spent in the region of £5 (plus credit card fees) on it.

Stevie Whoseyafather, from Lyingair, commented: “I had to bend over for about an hour and half with Micky on top so the bloody agency could get the angle right, but we think it looks great and really shows off our corporate values”.

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Ryanair’s evil CEO Mr Michael O’Leary is again employing bullyboy tactics in an effort to scare Boeing into accepting lesser terms and conditions in the sale of 200 new aircraft to the Irish airline.

Negotiations have been ongoing for over a year now and O’Leary claims that Ryanair have “effectively reached agreement on the price for 200 aircraft, but Boeing now wants to renegotiate delivery terms that would be worse than we currently have”.

Ryanair’s board will meet Dec. 17. Mr. O’Leary said that if no deal had been reached by then, the deal would be off.

If the airline and Boeing can’t strike a deal, Mr. O’Leary has said that Ryanair will throttle back its expansion plans. It will defer deliveries from Boeing of several 737s ordered in recent years, cancel options to buy 10 737s, and distribute cash to shareholders. Beyond 2012, the company would largely stop growing for the foreseeable future, Mr. O’Leary has said.

A Boeing spokesman said the company wouldn’t comment on customer negotiations that were ongoing.

Well done Boeing, shame on you Ryanair. Grow up wont you.