NEVER FLY RYAN AIR

Yesterday, I travelled by train from Saint Andrews, Scotland to Glasgow Prestwyck Airport in order to catch a flight to Stockholm on Ryan Air. By the end of the day, I was back in London fuming. What happened?

When I arrived at the airport, Ryan Air’s check-in staff informed me that I would have to pay £225 to bring my luggage with me. That’s about $380. I would then, of course, have to pay the same amount to bring my luggage back from Stockholm for a total of $760. How much luggage did I have with me? It was less than I carried from New York to London in June on American Airlines with no extra fees for weight.

I tried to be imaginative about other options, but there were none. I either had to pay $380 twice or allow Ryan Air to destroy my belongings. They put a figurative gun to my head and said: give us your money or your belongings if you want to get out of here.

At the moment, their website advertises fares of £4 from London-Stansted to as far away as Bratislava, Krakow, and, yes, Stockholm, not including ‘optional fees/Charges’. I don’t know how protecting oneself from criminals, i.e. Ryan Air, is ‘optional’, but that’s what they call it. According to Wikipedia, Ryan Air’s business model depends on what is called ‘ancillary revenue’, which means revenue from sources other than the ostensible main service provided, e.g. baggage fees rather than air travel tickets. In Strabonapedia, their business model is called ‘extortion’. If you fly with them, you are directly supporting organized crime.